Tantrums that have you on edge, a toddler stuck on ‘nope’, or daily power struggles that make you question your sanity… does this sound like your life?
Maybe your toddler is hitting others, throwing things or screaming, leaving you stressed and worried about your bond, or they can’t calm down after something frustrating ticks them off and you’re not sure how to help either.
It’s a lot, and it’s normal to feel lost.
In Montessori, we see the development of the will as a this long, phased process: your kid’s learning to follow their inner guide, say “no”, push back, and assert themselves around 2-3. It’s called the crisis of affirmation / opposition - their brain is figuring out identity and control, and this can show up as tantrums, strong defiance or trouble settling. Our role is to guide them gently, respecting this growth while setting boundaries - providing them with lots of freedom within sensible limits, and making it clear what our expectation of their behavior is.
Here are some quick tips:
- Use less, positive words: instead of “get off the table! we don’t climb the table!” try “no. It’s time to put your feet on the floor.”
- Physically remove them or stop them as soon as you can if they start doing something destructive or that is against the rules you’ve set.
- Think of your spaces and routines - where you can give your child more freedom?
- Pick your battles so you can be very consistent with the limits you’re setting.
- Set up a cosy spot and practice rituals that they can use to calm down on their own.
As an AMI-certified Montessori 0-3 guide and your parenting sidekick, I can help you understand and manage your child’s behavior in a way that is developmentally appropriate and rebuild connection through firm + kind discipline. Book a free 15-min call with me, share your challenges, and let’s create a plan together.